What?! The plans you refer to will soon be back in our hands. In my experience, there is no such thing as luck. I\’m trying not to, kid. Jedi Academy Don\’t act so surprised, Your Highness. You weren\’t on any mercy mission this time. Several transmissions were beamed to this ship by Rebel spies. I […]
\’Captain America\’ takes a monumental trip to Washington Read More »
A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow…and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner. Kids, kids. I\’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. Kids, kids. I\’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. Slow down, Bart! My legs
Noah review: Is Russell Crowe\’s Biblical epic movie gold? Read More »
Sorry, checking all the water in this area; there\’s an escaped fish. *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I\’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! Did I mention we have comfy chairs? Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I\’ve always known him: Jeff. Saving the world with meals on wheels.
Tony Goldwyn and Other Reasons \’Scandal\’ Gladiators Will Love \’Divergent\’ Read More »
What\’s Spanish for \”I know you speak English?\” First place chick is hot, but has an attitude, doesn\’t date magicians. There\’s only one man I\’ve ever called a coward, and that\’s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I\’m calling you is a television actor. Michael! Marry me. I don\’t criticize you! And if you\’re worried about
We Need Kate Winslet to Play More Bad Guys Like Her \’Divergent\’ Character Read More »
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Ranking Shows Inspired by \’Sex and the City\’ Read More »
I have traced the Rebel spies to her. Now she is my only link to finding their secret base. Don\’t underestimate the Force. You don\’t believe in the Force, do you? The Force Unleashed In my experience, there is no such thing as luck. What good is a reward if you ain\’t around to use
\’How I Met Your Mother\’ Recap: Robin and Barney Get Married Read More »
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. …And the fluffy kitten played with that ball of string all through the night. On a lighter note, a Kwik-E-Mart clerk was brutally murdered last night. That\’s why I love elementary school, Edna. The children believe anything you tell them. Natural
CinemaCon: Universal Unveils First \’Fifty Shades of Grey\’ Footage Read More »
Well, how\’d you become king, then? Well, Mercia\’s a temperate zone! I dunno. Must be a king. The Knights Who Say Ni demand a sacrifice! What… is your quest? Burn her anyway! Now, look here, my good man. What do you mean? Camelot! Burn her! We want a shrubbery!! Oh! Come and see the violence
Jim Parsons: \’I\’m not that guy,\’ Sheldon Cooper Read More »
OK, this has gotta stop. I\’m going to remind Fry of his humanity the way only a woman can. Hey! I\’m a porno-dealing monster, what do I care what you think? Ah, computer dating. It\’s like pimping, but you rarely have to use the phrase \”upside your head.\” I love this planet! I\’ve got wealth,
Heh-haa! Super squeaky bum time! It\’s art! A statement on modern society, \’Oh Ain\’t Modern Society Awful?\’! *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I\’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! Army of Ghosts You\’ve swallowed a planet! I\’m the Doctor, I\’m worse than everyone\’s aunt. *catches himself* And that is
James Cameron on 3D: From the Mariana Trench to \’Avatar\’ Read More »
